The Prank's on Me
by Cumberbatch Critter
Summary: They're just a couple of pranksters- until someone gets hurt. Monroe & Nick friendship!fic.


**The Prank's on Me**

The first time that Nick pranked Monroe was a little surprising for the _Blutbad_. It had been late at night and he hadn't been expecting a call. When his cell rang, he glanced towards the inconspicuous object on the table before frowning. Who was calling this late?

Who was he kidding? Who else called him?

He swiped the phone off the table and hit the mute button on the television remote before accepting the call.

"Monroe speaking."

_"Hey, baby."_

He almost dropped the phone. His mind was froze up, somewhere in between the bedroom voice and the name calling, and he couldn't even form the sentence to ask who the _hell_ he was talking to. "Um..."

Laughter on the other end of the line set him off, laughter that he recognized without much analyzing.

"Nick!" he spat, feeling his face flush crimson as he let out a sigh of relief. He really thought maybe it was some weird, possessed chick that had gotten his number off of someone he'd done a clock for.

_"Oh,"_ Nick laughed, Monroe growing ever increasingly annoyed and embarrassed the more the Grimm laughed, _"That was perfect; you went _dead_ silent! What? Oh, no, Juliette, I'm talking to a friend. No, no, he's a guy, I was just messing with him. Say hi, Monroe."_

"I feel like I shouldn't..." he muttered, a slight echo in his ears revealing he'd put on speaker. "Hi. Yeah, I'm really a guy and Nick's really an ass."

_"There you go, Monroe._" A chuckle. _"You know it was funny."_

He huffed. "Is there something you wanted asides from acting like a pervert?"

_"Pervert? I don't think... Anyway, no, not really."_

Monroe groaned. "I'm going to bed," he muttered, ending the call before Nick could respond. He was sure, back at his house, Nick was still laughing.

* * *

><p>When it came down to it, Monroe was a very competitive person. And he wasn't about to be outwitted by a Grimm, that was for sure. So, the next time that Nick came around, Monroe put his plan into action.<p>

He'd finally gotten his hands on some nice burdock root awhile ago, and he hated to use it on stupid stuff like this, but he couldn't pass up the opportunity. It was an amazing diuretic, after all.

He slipped a large amount- not any amount that would make Nick sick, of course- of burdock into Nick's tea that he was making that afternoon. He then added enough honey to choke a _Mellifer_, Nick liked things overly sweet things, and gave it to Nick. The detective drank it down without a word, focused on his case.

It was about an hour later that Nick suggested they go talk to the father of the victim. He was a nice old man- and also a Wesen who wouldn't speak without some incentive. Nick hoped Monroe would be that incentive. Monroe agreed.

About ten minutes into their thirty minute car, Monroe noticed Nick's body movement go from stiff to squirming. And he smiled to himself, looking at the window. Some part of himself said he was a sick bastard. He didn't care.

Ten more minutes, and it was painfully obvious, although Monroe's concerned _"What's wrong?"_ still cut the air.

"Nothing," was the terse response.

Monroe didn't realize Nick was so shy. He laughed, tried to stifle it and failed, and he knew he'd given himself away because Nick threw him a sharp, wide-eyed, beginning to grow angry look. Monroe just stared out the window, his reflection smiling back at him.

When they arrived, Nick didn't even bother to turn off the car before he high-tailed it into the fancy-pants hotel that their guy lived in. Monroe laughed to himself as he turned off the car and followed suit, leaning against the wall inside to wait.

Nick reemerged from the lobby bathrooms a few minutes later, shooting the most hateful look he could muster through his embarrassment. "That was not cool..."

"Funny, though."

"What, is that your kink or something?" Nick muttered, avoiding Monroe's gaze.

"Kink? Um... no? Just amusing. I never told you to take a thirty minute drive."

"That's not fair."

"All's fair in love and war," Monroe mused, grinning. "It's one to one now," he added, before heading for the stairs.

* * *

><p>When it came down to it... it turned out Nick wasn't the type of person to give up easily, either. And, as time marched on, their pranks got more and more tasteless, in a sense.<p>

It was another phone call. Monroe half expected it to be a prank, and even answered it with a cheerful_ "Hey Nick, what's the prank this time? Better make it good"_.

_"Monroe-"_ The phone cut out, although Monroe recognized Nick's voice.

"Nick? What's happening?" he demanded immediately, tightening his grip on the phone. Something felt off, and it instantly put him on edge.

_"-just- attacked and- these guys... dangerous, man-"_

"Nick? Where are you? Where do they have you at? Tell me!"

_"Monroe, just- tell Juliette-"_

"Tell her what?" he snapped, claws extending past his fingertips. The static was an impediment that he wanted to rip away, just so he could hear the entirety of the phone call. "Nick!"

_"- love her-"_ There a thump, followed by a yelp that sounded far too close. A slow shiver caught his frame, working from his hairline to his toes before he unfroze, the now-silence pounding into his ears amplified.

"Nick?" he whispered into the phone, although it had gone dead silent on the other end. He checked to see if the call was still connected, it was, before pressing it back to his ear. "Nick?"

He received no reply and was about to honestly throw the phone and jump the door and just track Nick to wherever he was. "Nick!" he demanded, once again.

This time he got a response.

_"It's two to one now, Monroe. Your go,"_ was the response with a laugh before the line went dead.

He was left standing, halfway to his door, with the beeping of an ended call in his ear. He didn't stop shaking for five minutes, and it took even longer for his heartbeat to slow.

So, yeah, their pranks got more and more tasteless.

* * *

><p>He hadn't gotten back onto the prank kick for the longest time. Nick's latest had left him with some sort of chill, even though Nick apologized not even a solid twenty-four hours without any incentive to.<p>

He finally got around to it, though, when they were out investigating an abandoned warehouse together.

Monroe had taken some black peppercorn, black pepper, red pepper, thyme, and cayenne pepper and ground it all up, dumping it into a small photo film canister before hitting the road to meet with Nick. He had no idea how many times he had sneezed during making the stuff.

When he got there, he found Nick's car and no Nick, which meant that he was already inside. Brilliant. He dumped a small bit of the powder on his hand before rubbing it on Nick's car door handle. He then tried the door- it was unlocked- and pulled the door open. He smeared the powder all over the steering wheel, and dumped the excess into the fan. That'd keep Nick busy for awhile.

He wouldn't get to see the end of the prank, but, chuckling to himself, he decided it didn't matter.

* * *

><p>When his phone rang later that night, only about ten minutes after he'd gotten home, he expected an irate Nick. He didn't expect Hank.<p>

"This is he..." he muttered suspiciously in return when Hank had asked for him.

"You're a friend of Nick's, right?"

"Yeah... What's up?"

"He's at the hospital. Two car collision."

Monroe's world had stopped before the two sentences were even out. He was immediately taken up by a sense of guilt- Nick had probably crashed his car due to him. Due to his stupid prank and his stupid sneezing powder and... stupid, stupid, stupid!

He half growled out a response to Hank before hitting the end button, taking off in his VW to the hospital. He'd never forgive himself if something terrible happened to Nick. He would never, _ever _forgive himself.

* * *

><p>"Nick! Nick, tell me that you're going to be okay!"<p>

He didn't know why he was yelling, and several nurses shot him dark glances as he rushed into Nick's hospital room. Confused eyes met his before Nick smiled thinly.

"I'm okay, Monroe. I didn't expect you to..." he trailed off into a coughing fit, Monroe's fingers closed around his car keys so tight that it hurt him, before responding with "... be the one who came running into my hospital room first."

"Well, of course, I mean, it's my fault, and I am _so_ sorry. I didn't- I mean, I didn't ever intend-"

"What are you talking about?"

"The sneezing powder! The prank! And then you wrecked..."

Nick's eyes lit up with recognition. "Oh! Sneezing powder! I wondered why I couldn't stop sneezing there for awhile..."

"I just..." Monroe stopped, blowing air out through his lips heavily. He was flustered, way too flustered. He didn't even know what to say. This was his fault, but he didn't know what to say when faced with his victim.

"Anyway, it's not your fault. I didn't cause the wreck. Some guy tried to pass me when I was making a turn... Ran right into him. Didn't see him coming. Didn't expect him to do that..." Nick trailed off again, his expression turning stony. "The guy's worse off than I am."

"Well, good!" Monroe exclaimed loudly, startling Nick and even himself. "Well, you know, if he was the stupid ass to pass you when you were making a turn," he stressed, settling a bit of the confusion in Nick's eyes.

"Oh, well, yeah, I guess. I should have been paying attention."

"He shouldn've pulled out!"

He noticed he was quick to blame the other person- now that he knew that it wasn't his fault and now that he could see the beginnings of guilt gnawing away at Nick's usually cheerful exterior.

"Maybe so, but still..." Nick went quiet again before he perked up. "Guess it's two to two now."

"What?"

"Two to two... The prank."

"Oh, yeah... _No!_ No more, Nick... Look what happened." It wasn't like he had totally lost his guilt, either. He was just handling it better because he had someone else to blame for Nick's injuries, which didn't appear to be so severe. Nonetheless... these pranks. They were just bad for both of their states of health.

"The prank wasn't to blame..." Nick muttered, suddenly pulling the part, whether he intended to or not, of sad toddler who's just been denied his favourite toy.

Monroe sighed. "It's just not good. We had our fun. All good things have to end."

Nick stared at him for a moment before following Monroe's example of sighing. "Fine. No more pranks."

Little did Monroe know that Nick had his fingers crossed under the blankets...

* * *

><p><strong>AN: No, I'm not writing a sequel! Yes, it's a mild cliffy, it's meant to be a cliffy, and it's up to imagination if you guys want to take their pranks further.<strong>

**Anyway, one of the many ideas that came to me at like, four in the morning a few days ago. I finally managed to get it done.**

**Reviews would be appreciated. Thanks!**


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